I am miserable, Its crappy weather, I'm tired its gray outside, my period comes in a week oh did I mention I feel like crap ? I got dressed this morning and I look pregnant :( The only reason I'm not crying as I type is because my 4 year old is beside me. I have a runny nose and a cough and I think I'm getting sick, when I walked my son to school i couldn't wear a jacket cause all mine are in storage and the other 3 adult in my home are all smaller than me. I want to sleep, and i want to go to bed before 12. I am a mess today and I really don't know if i will recover. I am a puddle on the floor. Right now I can't, and i don't feel like it will turn around anytime soon.
A miserable end of a Miserable day
A terrible end to my day, i started to run and immediately my toes started to burn, OMG flaming death. I made it through 4 of the 6 runs, running faster than normal but the pain was too intense so 20 minutes in, I stopped. I went into the change room feeling like pure crap. I should have taken 2 min then marched my sorry butt back in there but after my day I couldn't. For some reason, I couldn't bring myself to do it. So defeated I got into my bathing suit and sat in the hot tub. I have never felt so S***ty in my whole life. I am starting to feel that I am getting burned out, maybe I just have too much stress, maybe its because I'm getting my period, I just don't know. I am struggling with my return to the gym, ALOT ! I think its time to call in for back up and have someone come with me. I am so scared that this could be the beginning of my end, I am not ready for this journey to end. When do I return? I am debating tomorrow because I fear that if i don't return soon that I won't return. I am sad, frustrated and disappointed with myself. All I can think is I failed, will this be a bump in the road or the catalyst that started the end.
A better question.. WHY DO MY SHOES BURN MY FEET SO DAMN BAD ?? I really wish I knew :(
My eating habits have gone down the crapper too, I am just hungry a lot, and I feel like crap when I eat crap but my body seems to think I neeedddd that !!!I guess I just feel like my life is really unbalanced, I feel that so much has spiraled out of control in the last 3 days. I am still on the couch to 5K program I am still on the couch and I should be ending week three .. FAIL !! ick !!!!!